NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA
1. Bring your own house.
2. If you are going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school, and hospital.
3. If you are going to Edmonton, wear your flak jacket. This is the murder capital of Canada.
4. If you are driving to Edmonton, note that it is also the auto theft center of Canada .
5. If you are bringing drugs, head straight to Fort McMurray, the drug capital of Canada .